Ways to be less intimidating
There is a classic story about the mother who believed in spanking as a necessary part of discipline until one day she observed her three- year-old daughter hitting her one-year-old son.
When confronted, her daughter said, “I’m just playing mommy.” This mother never spanked another child.
When one group of toddlers tried to grab a forbidden object, they received a slap on the hand; the other group of toddlers did not receive physical punishment.
In follow-up studies of these children seven months later, the punished babies were found to be less skilled at exploring their environment.
You may have a hug-hit ratio of 100:1 in your home, but you run the risk of your child remembering and being influenced more by the one hit than the 100 hugs, especially if that hit was delivered in anger or unjustly, which happens all too often.
Scars on the mind may last longer than scars on the body.Many parents do it without thinking, but consider the consequences.Maria Montessori, one of the earliest opponents of slapping children’s hands, believed that children’s hands are tools for exploring, an extension of the child’s natural curiosity. Sensitive parents we have interviewed all agree that the hands should be off-limits for physical punishment. Psychologists studied a group of sixteen fourteen-month-olds playing with their mothers.If this guideline were to be faithfully observed 99 percent of spanking wouldn’t occur, because once the parent has calmed down he or she can come up with a more appropriate method of correction.VERBAL AND EMOTIONAL “HITTING” Physical hitting is not the only way to cross the line into abuse.
Parents, remember, you are bringing up someone else’s mother or father, and wife or husband.